Life as I know it

Life is funny isn’t it? Just when you think you’ve got it all figured out, just when you finally begin to plan something, get excited about it and feel like you know what direction you’re heading in, the paths change, the signs change, the wind blows the other way, North is suddenly South and East is West and you’re lost.

If your life isn’t like this, well welcome to the life of a Mother. Welcome to my life.

This is what I think a Real Mom is..
A Real Mom:
Emotional, yet the rock.
Tired, but keeps going.
Worried, but full of hope.
Impatient, yet patient.
Overwhelmed but never quits.
Amazing, even though doubted.
Wonderful, even in the chaos.
Life changer, every single day.

I’ve tried and failed at many things in life but I will never stop giving 100% at being the best Mom I can be. I’ve already learned from the best, my Mom and Grandma’s were the best examples on how to give 100% in being a Mom.

A real Mom is emotional.
One may say I’m not a very emotional person but ever since I became a Mom I’ve also become more emotional. I cry because the laundry isn’t done or the dishes are piled up in the sink. I freak out on my fiance when I come home from work and have a million things to do and he’s sitting on the couch playing video games. I want to punch a hole in the door (I actually did one time) because things aren’t going my way or aren’t going as planned. Sometimes I feel as if I’m losing my shit on a daily basis. Sometimes I just want to run away. Then I have to tell myself to take a deep breath, slam a door or kick something (it really does help sometimes, don’t judge me) and realize I can’t change some things. I can’t change what someone else is going to do or not going to do, I can only change what I do and how I react to situations. I’m still working on that.

A real Mom is tired.
My son has been sleeping through the night since he was 5 months old. Yet somehow I am still always tired. Tired from never getting enough sleep or tired from getting too much sleep, tired of always having something to clean or do, tired of having to tell others what to do, tired of still having these stupid stretch marks on my sides and legs, tired of never having enough motivation to work out so I can look hot like all my other friends, just plain tired. Those are the reasons I think and know why I’m tired physically and mentally ALL the time. but really here’s why Mom’s are always so tired; If you’re a Mom you’re not just a “Mom” you are also a housekeeper, chef, teacher, nurse, coach, chauffeur, story teller, monster killer, planner, organizer, decorator, best friend, multi-tasking queen, wonder woman. And guess what? It’s all done for FREE. Friends, family, and hubby’s stop asking why we’re exhausted all the time and read the above. That’s why. Would I change it? Well would you if you had a son as cute as mine? Probably not.

A real Mom is worried.
Constantly worried if you’re doing a good enough job is exhausting. It’s hard not to look at other Mom’s and be like, well shit they’re doing a way better job than I am. STOP RIGHT THERE. Every Mom is different and does things differently. One way is not better than the other. I have to tell myself this daily. But not even just worrying about that. I worry about the world my son will live in. I worry every day that he is safe and healthy and nothing bad ever happens to him. Worrying is just apart of motherhood. Which is why I didn’t want to be apart of that club in the first place. I absolutely hate to worry, I have enough to worry about in this world already. Now I have another human being who I am responsible for for 18+ years but who I will worry about for the rest of my life. That brings us back up to being tired and emotional. It all ties together.

A real Mom is impatient.
I’m the most impatient person in the entire world. Seriously I really think I am, ask my fiance. But when dealing with my son I am both. I feel like I’m going to explode from being so impatient when he just won’t quit whining or he won’t eat his food or won’t go to sleep. But all at the same time on the outside I’m usually very calm, and have my Mom voice on. Soothe talking so he knows everything is fine and that I’m here always. I don’t like to yell when I get impatient and sometimes I do, but I’ll instantly regret it and tell myself to chill the f*ck out. You can be a mess and still be a good Mom. We are allowed to be both.

A real Mom is overwhelmed.
It all ties together with everything I’ve said above. Being overwhelmed has to do with being emotional, tired, worried and impatient. It’s all so overwhelming on top of everything else you have to face in life. That’s what Mom’s get to deal with. But you know what? Breathe. Your kids need you. Not perfect, but you. With all your worries, and laughs, failures, and try again’s. Your love, your showing up; that’s what matters. Breathe, sweet Mom.

A real Mom is amazing.
A mother is an amazing person. She gives life, she nurtures, she teaches, she cares. She is strong, she is vibrant, she is versatile. She is loyal, she is dedicated, she is diverse. A mother is by no means perfect and every mother makes mistakes. However, she learns as she goes and becomes stronger by the day. There is nobody more determined, there is nobody more committed and there is nobody more dependable than a mother.

A real Mom is wonderful.
My hope is that he will remember Mommy tried. Even when she was tired, even when she was stressed. I hope he will know that I did it all for him. That I had every intention of being wonderful but that some days all I could be was okay.

A real Mom is a life changer.
Dear Mom who needs to be reminded that she matters — this is your reminder. You are a life changer. You gave a person life. Now, go back to all you are doing — your cleaning, working, driving, nose-wiping, cooking, clothes folding, everyday things — and hold your head high. Motherhood matters. More than having the perfect house, the perfect body, the perfect planning schedule, the perfect kids, the perfect anything. You are a game changer. You are a life changer. You are a mother.

I’ll leave you with this..

Dear Lord, it’s such a crazy day
with little time to stop and pray.
For life’s been anything but calm,
since you called me to be a Mom.
Running errands, matching socks
building dreams with building blocks
Cooking, cleaning and finding shoes
And other stuff that children lose
Fitting lids on bottled bugs
wiping tears and giving hugs
A stack of last weeks mail to read
So where’s the quiet time that I need?
Yet when I steal a minute, Lord
Just at the sink or ironing board
To ask the blessings of Your grace
I see then, in my small one’s face
That you have blessed me
All the while and I stop to kiss
That precious smile

Mom’s a reminder you’re not going through it alone. Head up and leave me your thoughts below.

Cheers, Nicole.


4 thoughts on “Life as I know it

  1. Tova says:

    These are great words. I wish this would hold true for all moms out there. “Both” of my mother’s should have read this, or had some body say this. And as for me now I hope my boy understands why.

    Liked by 1 person

    • NICOLE says:

      I wish it did to! Unfortunately it doesn’t and I can’t imagine anyone treating a child any differently than this. All anyone can do is learn from their parents mistakes and be better! I guarantee he will understand where you were coming from and what you needed to do for him and yourself.


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